June 2005

Eight years ago today one of the most tragic things that can happen in your life happened to my family and me. My father lost his life in a terrible car accident. Every year on this day I am reminded of him. Of course I think of him at other times too. It’s the anniversary that always hits me though.

It’s something we all have to face at some point in our life, the death of a parent. I was young when my dad died. However, I’m the eldest of two younger sisters and they had him for even less time. He never got to meet my sister’s two beautiful baby boys Ethan and Jackson, but somehow I know he’s with them just as he’s with me and my sisters and our mom too.

I feel that it’s important to honor him on this day. I try to take some time out each year to think about how his influence in my life made me who I am and all the gifts that he gave me. He taught me so much. I remember specific things like the fact that he was always using big words around me and telling me I needed to have a good vocabulary because it would make me smarter and better able to communicate in the world. I remember how much I am like him and how much of him is carried on in the world because I’m still here and remembering.

I’m sad because of all the things he’s missed in the time since he’s been gone. He would’ve have loved this internet thing. My sister was living at home right before the accident and she had just gotten a new Mac. My husband, my sister and I were showing him how you could take digital video and make your own movies just a day before he died. He teased my sister about the fact that he was going to be spending lots of time bogarting her computer. He was so smart and it really would’ve been a world he would have relished exploring.

June 30th, 1997 is one of those days in time that I will never forget. It is etched in my memory. I remember all the things that happened that day. I remember what I was doing. I remember talking to my mom on the phone about the great weekend we had visiting. We were all together, my sisters, my husband, my brother-in-law and my parents. We went out that Saturday night to celebrate my sister’s first wedding anniversary. We had a wonderful dinner and laughed heartily about the fact that my dad, my brother-in-law, and my husband had all recently caught the same interesting documentary on the History channel. He liked that kind of programming. Apparently my sister and I had found mates with similar taste, it was a good chuckle. Later that night we all went to a coffee shop and played board games. Usually we fought when we played games. It was different that night. We teased each other, but nobody really got upset or competitive, we just went with the flow. My dad had his first mocha and remarked how much he liked it. We really enjoyed each other and being together. I think this is where my philosophy of ‘everything happens for a reason’ embedded itself in my life. We needed to be together and we needed to enjoy that time because that was the last time we were ever together that way. He died two days later.

And I distinctly remember the phone call. My mom’s good friend left us a message. We never actually answer the phone and I don’t think we even had caller ID at that time. She didn’t say what happened, but I knew I had to call her back right away. She told me that dad was in an accident. All I could think about was getting to my mom. My husband and I pulled everything together as quickly as possible, dropped keys off at our friends house and headed back the way we had just come the day before.

When I got to my parents house I found out that the state patrol had come to the door that day to tell mom. Fortunately my sister was with my mom and the authorities informed them of what happened. I am so grateful to my sister for being there. They found out together and they had each other at that horrible moment. It was our worst nightmare and it had come true.

The following hours, days, weeks and months were a blur. It was the first death in my life. I had no idea what to expect and honestly the grieving process still surprises me. You don’t get over it.

And this anniversary I am away from home. I am away from my family, my husband, my doggies and everything that makes me feel safe. In fact, I’m not even in the country. I wasn’t sure how this would go and I don’t think I ever want to be away again on this day. However, life goes on and we have to live it. My dad would be really proud of me. I’m doing my work and contributing to my profession in my small way by sharing knowledge that I have learned. This day is always going to be hard no matter what the circumstances. I was lucky to have him as long as I did. I’m grateful and I’ll spend the day with memories of him and I won’t be alone anymore.

As this is my first year of blogging and this is the first June 30th, I document these thoughts in his honor. Life is precious and it is important to treasure the quiet seemingly simple and mundane moments. (like playing board games with your family and drinking mochas)

One last lesson he imparted on me that I want to share with you. He always said, ‘don’t sweat the small stuff’, take that away as a thought for the day and give your parents a hug too.

So many great radio moments happened this week on the Current.

Mary Lucia playing FogHat and then throwing it in our faces. She talked about how great it was that she could DO that. She wanted people to pledge and I know at least one friend of mine that did just because of that. I’m pretty sure she made her point with a few others too.

And then, the last day, the last moments before the drive ended, the web site crashed because so many people were trying to get in and bring it home to meet the goal. It was the same on the other stations, I was flipping between the channels. I love MPR and the drama at the end when they are so close is really good radio.

So on the current, they said ‘we think we made it, this is huge, it’s gigantic….” and then started playing Gigantic by the Pixies. And I have to be honest, I was driving to the store in my Saturn wagon and I just turned it up really loud and celebrated. I LOVE the fact that this community can support MPR. We are so freakin lucky that we live amongst like-minded people that will band together and make it happen.

I personally want to thank everyone who is a member and is doing as much as they can. I’m doing my part, but it wouldn’t matter without everyone else doing the same. Thanks fellow citizens.

Funding was restored. The public spoke up.

This is really going too far.

“This programming is not simply — it’s not supposed to be the personal playhouse of the left wing in this country.” That’s what George Neumayer claimed this evening on the The News Hour with Jim Lehrer. You can read the entire transcript if you like.

The thing is, there’s no proof. Public television and radio are left wing playgrounds? Those are very strong accusations to throw around without proof.

Commercial media is abhorrent. I have no respect left for journalists other than the journalists on PBS and NPR and all the local affiliates. They are the only journalists left that aren’t driven by market forces.

And as for the fact that the American taxpayer is paying SO MUCH MONEY to fund this liberal playground. Here are the facts.

* UK: $210 per household, Japan: $240 per household
* U.S.: $1.25 per person
* PBS is the least publicly funded public broadcaster in any democratic country

So each of us is paying $1.25 a year for public broadcasting? How much am I paying for that war that I thought was a terrible idea? Why do I have to pay for that again?

This will rip the insides out of rural America. Take away Sesame Street, go ahead. Every action has an equal and opposite reaction. I wonder what the children will say when there is no more Big bird. You were so worried about what to tell the children when president Clinton lied, what will you tell them about this?

Just wondering.

Republican, democrat, sick of it or just don’t care? If you like Sesame Street, please tell your Congressperson. Please do something……

The city is always so pretty when it’s wet.

I went to Applebee’s this weekend. I was in Brookings with my family, there are only a few choices, we thought Applebee’s was the best choice.

As it turns out, they have many items listed on their menu that disclose full nutrition information. I have to say I was actually delighted. The only way for Americans to make good choices about their health is to give them the information. I had lots of choice and I was easily able to make a good choice from the options I was presented.

After years of mediocre service at Applebee’s chains, this spruced up menu and great service definitely opened my eyes. I’ll definitely go their again.

Thanks for giving us information so we don’t have to continue to be obese.

his post:

“Reasonable people adapt themselves to the world. Unreasonable people attempt to adapt the world to themselves. All progress, therefore, depends on unreasonable people.”

–George Bernard Shaw
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I’ve been thinking about this quite a bit. It’s more relevant now than ever before because the rate of change is so constant. Our world requires a very accelerated adaptation skill set. It must be very frightening to not be comfortable with change. However, it may be that very discomfort that cause things to change and move in your favor.

There is also this notion of disruptive in this quote. ‘Unreasonable’ if you will. We are constantly adapting for the world and adpating it. The most successful art is the kind of art that acts as a mirror on ourselves. The mirror provides a view for constant checking and also deep reflection, if we take that opportunity.

So be aware and be reasonable. But remember to be unreasonable once in awhile too and help to move things forward.

In technology, you get used to change. Yesterday my husband upgraded our blog experience. He installed WordPress at home. We’d been using blogger to get off the ground and that was amazing. It got us started. You can set it up so fast.

Now I feel like I’ve gone from the nice but compact car to the luxury sedan. I can set many blogs up. These blogs can have different users. I have ultimate control over look and feel.

I’ve been using WordPress for awhile because I post on the MNteractive weblog which uses WP. I just never thought I’d have one of my very own.

Props go out to my computer geek husband. Thanks for always being there to provide this gadget girl all the best in optimal technology experiences. I’m lucky.

We’ve changed venues.

Thomas just installed Word Press, so we are on our own blog channel now!

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